I know it has been awhile since I've written last. Texas...things happened in Texas. I can't even put them into words yet that's how terrible they were. The images are there in my head, like they were etched there by a ragged fingernail, but my body and my hands resist pressing the keys that would turn those images into words.
Our first few stops in Texas were pleasant...but nothing had prepared us for what was going to happen. Nothing. The look in their eyes...
That was weeks ago. We--those few that remained--stopped in New Orleans afterwards and although that city opened its heart to us we really couldn't enjoy the hospitality. The news never reported what happened; the story was squelched. When we tried to explain no one could really understand what it was like. Not unless you were there. I called Phoebe, and told her as best I could what had happened. If I don't find the strength to write about it soon--or if something should happen to me--I've asked her to help me get the story out. But without Karen to help her, and with everything that is happening in Oakvale, and don't know that anyone would listen.
All I'll say now is that the little caravan that we had has now been reduced to one vehicle, our hand painted van. There's only a few of us still traveling; some went back to where they were from, others we had to leave in Texas. We had to leave them in Texas and they won't be returning.
"I'd almost forgotten what it was like to not exist," Darius, one of the guys who'd joined us in Denver said when we were miles away from the attack. It was the first thing that any of us had said in a few hours.
We're on our way to Memphis now, a stop I swore we'd make to help three of our brothers and sisters who need our help. We're doing almost all of our traveling now at night, and during the day we have to be careful where we park so that our living drivers can get some sleep in the van. The miles roll past and I'll think about people I thought I knew and then I'll wonder if they were ever really there at all.
I feel like my whole life right now is staring out a car window, looking for something that that I'll never find.
Saturday, May 1, 2010
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40 comments:
OMG! Tommmyyyy! my heart goes out to you. I live in New Orleans. But that's terrible that you couldn't enjoy the city while you were here. I'm sorry for the trouble that you have experienced but keep your head up. It'll get better in time.
sincerely ours,
Duaa
is christie okay, tommy? did she make it? where is karen? what do you know?
please. please. I have to know.
I'm so sorry. It's hard sometimes to be a zombie. And, though it isn't fair, stuff like this happens to us for it. I wish I could turn back time for you guys so you could have known and stain away. Stay safe, though. Please.
~Everyone
Hey Tommy! Great to hear from you. I check back everyday to see your new posts, and I was worried when you hadn't posted in so long! I hope your journies are safe, and I hope you will help with equality between Beating Hearts and the DBs.
<3xoxo
Thanks for posting Tommy! We were getting worried when you hadn't posted for so long. I'm sorry that you lost some of your friends though. Good luck in Memphis! We're praying for you.
oh my goodness, what happened? i'll keep you in my thoughts. i hope that things improve. never forget those of us that support you!
-a trad girl
oh my goodness, what happened? i'll keep you all in my thoughts. never forget that there are a ton of us who support you, and wish for the best for you and your friends! keep up the good work.
-a trad girl
I was starting to worry when you have not posted in a while and now I see you had good reason! I am deeply sorry that Texas treated you so badly and I hope that the rest of your journey will be much much safer!
Hi, Tommy. It's nice to hear from you. It's been so long. Well, the day you posted was my birthday. I'm perpetually 14, but my body is 16 now. I'm sorry to hear about your troubles. Hopefully, there will be a light at the end of the tunnel. Hope to hear from you soon!
Bree
Hi, Tommy. It's nice to hear from you. It's been so long. Well, the day you posted was my birthday. I'm perpetually 14, but my body is 16 now. I'm sorry to hear about your troubles. Hopefully, there will be a light at the end of the tunnel. Hope to hear from you soon!
Bree
Hi, Tommy. It's nice to hear from you. It's been so long. Well, the day you posted was my birthday. I'm perpetually 14, but my body is 16 now. I'm sorry to hear about your troubles. Hopefully, there will be a light at the end of the tunnel. Hope to hear from you soon!
Bree
i was getting really worried not hearing from you in a while, so im glad to see you posted, but sad to read what it is about. hope things work out better for you!!
ps may is Zombie Awareness Month and im not making that up. my latin teacher told me.
tommy
i really think you should stop by illinois. we are really hospitable and we have equality between the beating hearts and the DBs.
My prays are with you,Tommy.
why is it that texas is always the stereotypical discriminating state? so they're stubborn, proud, and set in their ways. leave them be. you don't try to push a bull!
I think that people... Have many struggles... You'll get through it.... And overcome.... It..... Everyone conquers the... Evil even if.... They don't want.... To.... Remember that....
Kisses of Death, ForeverDead
Hey Tommy,
I come on here as much as I possibly can. I will pray for you all to be safe. I'm sorry to hear about some the friends that had to leave but I know you will meet new people on the way. On this date it was my brother's 18 birthday. I hope we hear about the story soon but at the same time I dont mind letting you take your time. If it was a not good experience you shouldn't be pressured to write it right away. Good luck to all of you and hope to hear from you soon.
everything gets better was things are bad... im 11 and i even know that... i dont want you to forget that either...for you definatly have a long happy life ahead of you ;) lot of love,
ForeverDead<3
Tommy we up in saskatchewan send you love and hope on your journey. stay safe and post often
Isobelle
xo
♥♥
what happened in texas. . .?
oh gosh... im sorry tommy. reading this... if i culd still cry i would. thats scary... i hope you find the words to tell us what happened and i hope you stay safe.
i still cannot believe that people could be so cruel and uncaring a person is a person no matter how different they are and people need to realize this before things get way worse than they already are. it saddens me that some act they way they do to others its not right or fair. well tommy i wish u all the best in your travelers an hope everything goes ok
Oh, that must be horrible Tommy. I'd really like to know what happened. Keep writing, I was getting worried when you hadn't posted for a few months. Good luck on your trip.
Well, get ready for some more bad news. Tommy, I died 5 months ago in my woods around my house. Nobody saw it happen or see me com back. People, well most of my friends believe, don't believe I died. People of Martinsville, Indiana do not know about teens coming back after death. Please help us. Me and my friends pray for you.
God bless,
Kaylee Christine Howser
It may feel like it, but your never alone. What ever happens, remember that. Good Luck.
oh-em-double gee ( my new thing soz) wat happend in texas plz tell us and soon i almost re-died when you didnt post anything for months !!! plz find the strength to tell us all our love in england !!
imago&katyia
Oh wow! That sounds really tough...I hope everyone's okay. My heart goes out to you Tommy! Never give up! =D
Hope everything will be going better soon, why can't everyone just get along??
<3 ~ Meghan-Ashley ~
Ahhhhhhhhh! Please be safe!
Oh no, I'm so very sorry for you Tommy. Please remain safe and remember that your have more strength then any trad could hope to achieve!
...I think your heart beats louder then any living person...
this isnt real, your not real. just a charecter from an AMAZING novel. i cant beleive anymore, i tried once and failed; if this is the real thing wheres phoebes entries? yeah thats what i thought, i REALLY want to beleive but i'll just get overwhelmed in my own personnal obsession again. tommy, if your real; prove it, or stop by Oakton, VA . . .but i doubt it. BTW: i write too.
Hey Tommy! It's been so long! I hope things are going well. Please post soon.
Tell Phoebe and Karen I said hello and watch their backs for unsuspected for more people like Pete.
Please be safe, and please, don't die again.
Hey Tommy! It's been so long! I hope things are going well. Please post soon.
Tell Phoebe and Karen I said hello and watch their backs for unsuspected for more people like Pete.
Please be safe, and please, don't die again.
tommy im here if you need to talk i really am
in a way i know how its like without being dead...
Thanks, everyone. I've decided that what happened in texas needs to be told.
T.
seriously??where is karennn???!
:(
Hi Tommy,
Why do you think people who are dead aren't staying dead???
I just found this site and I think it's pretty cool.
:|
~dead
TOMMY I CRI FOR PRAYING THAT YOUR LIFE GETS BETTER.but i guess not i hope you find more friends along the way im sad it ended this way thoe hey get big guy you deserve it buddy hey promise me your mom and among phoebes life you stay live k k
Tommy, things will get better. But please tell us what happened! I have some family diwn there that would totally help out any way that they could. And I'm so sorry to hear that we lost some of our dear friends. Please stay safe and as far from harm's way as possible.
Love,
KayKat
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